Last updated on 2023-03-07 at 19:54 pm - Estimated reading time 00:03:26
“I would not claim to be able to answer this vast problem alone. However, although I am not yet convinced that it is absolutely necessary to renounce certain pleasures in order not to suffer, it nevertheless seems to me that the essential thing is that one does not aspire to pleasure by being satisfied with his own submission. It is therefore essential to seek pleasure and freedom without compromise, this is probably how one acquires what one could perhaps define as wisdom.
“This fight is the one I lead, and these marks that I wear are indeed there to remind me every day how the choices we make can turn out to be crucial and sometimes, permanent.
“Here is what I experienced some time ago when I had just arrived in Marseille. I was working on an important IT project for my company when I was the victim of a blackmail that changed the course of my life.
“I’ve never been very modest. All my troubles started after I was being forced to show myself in a clothing store. Then, they quickly became worse when I became the attraction of a night in a private club.
“But while I still saw it as a simple game to which I submitted myself with good grace, it was at this precise moment that I was blackmailed for the first time.
“At first, it was almost with delight that I complied with the erotic games that were imposed on me, and then doubt began to invade me as they became ever more demanding. It may seem strange that we sometimes give in to constraints which, with hindsight, appear to be quite harmless. However, I must also admit that it was curiosity that caused my loss.
“Soon, as if caught in an infernal gear, and carried by my most basic impulses that I began to walk the path of submission. Always playing my desires as one plays an instrument, I constantly discovered new facets of my sexuality while I was exhibited in increasingly erotic parties.
“You may disapprove of my behavior and I understand that in many ways I have crossed the boundaries of propriety while, like a courtesan, I openly indulged in lust.
“It is on this ever more dangerous path that I was made to venture, and although this life of debauchery seemed to me to have no end, I felt that my unstoppable depraved acts would inescapably send me down to hell.
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